I got my pay cheque today and decided that I should go and buy something I have wanted for a while.  After purchasing a new thermostat for my car (for which I will give a guy a case of Pilsner to replace) I went out and bought 6.5 lbs of pure, unadulterated nerd.  Yes, I (a high school drop out) decided to purchase a copy of Black’s Law Dictionary, 8th edition.  A hard cover black book of depression if you ask me…but neat none the less.

Here’s a snippet and a few definitions from the book starting with my favourite.

FREEMAN: 1. A person who possesses and enjoys all the civil and political rights belonging to the people under a free government.  2. A person who is not a slave. 3. Hist. A member of a municipal corporation (a city or borough) who possesses full civic rights, esp. the right to vote. 4. Hist. A freeholder. Cf. VILLEIN. 5. Hist. An allodial landowner. Cf VASSAL. – Also spelled free man.

Yes…I know what you’re thinking.  What a nerd.  Here’s the tricky bit.  I like the law dictionary because it gives me some insight on how the law works and how it regards people.  In old legalese, “human being” used to mean “monster” and “monster” was supposed to be something without human form.  I used to think that legal dictionaries still used to define “human being” but instead, they now define “person” as being a natural human being.  It’s very odd but pretty interesting at the same time if you have absolutely no life.  So the next definition I’ll lift from the book for you is…

PERSON: 1. A human being. – Also termed natural person. 2. The living body of a human being <contraband found on the smugglers person>. 3. An entity (such as a corporation) that is recognized by law as having the rights and duties of a human being. In this sense, the term includes partnerships and other associations, whether incorporated or unincorporated.

“So far as legal theory is concerned, a person is any being whom the law regards as capable of rights and duties.  Any being that is so capable is a person, whether a human being or not, and no being that is not so capable is a person, even though he be a man.  Persons are the substances of which rights and duties are the attributes.  It is only in this respect that persons possess juridical significance, and this is the exclusive point of view from which personality receives legal recognition.”  John Salmond, jurisprudence 318 (Glanville L Williams ed., 10th ed. 1947)

artificial Person. An entity, such as a corporation, created by law and given certain legal rights and duties of a human being; a being, real or imaginary, who for the purpose of legal reasoning is treated more or less as a human being.  An entity is a person for purposes of the Due Process and Equal Protection Clauses but is not a citizen for purposes of the Privileges and Immunities Clauses in article IV, § 2, and in the Fourteenth Amendment. – Also termed fictitious person; juristic person; juridical person; legal person; moral person. Cf LEGAL ENTITY.

And there’s more.  Actually the definition of “person” takes up pretty much an entire page…but that’s the bulk of it there.  Neat huh?  Well…even if you don’t think so, I do so nya nya to you.

I really like this big block of paper and ink.  It’s an interesting collection of snippets of legalese.  It makes me wonder how the legal system exists in its current form and why it must rely on so much peculiar terminology.  If you or I say “person” we pretty much know what we’re talking about but in here, person seems to mean any number of odd things.  Words like “free man” are given a place in the legal realm but who the heck knows what it actually means until they crack one of these books open?

Law has always piqued my interest and I had thought about going to law school when I was still attending high school.  Unfortunately, that’s pretty hard for a high school drop out to do and frankly, University seems like a continuation of the indoctrinational hole that I escaped from in the first place.  No…as it is, I’ll just have to be content with reading big books that other people probably find about as fascinating as a clump of dirt…which can also be pretty cool with a magnifying glass and microscope.

I stopped reading this article when I read the phrase “Excited Delirium.”  Now I’ll read the rest and blog a bit more about it.

One moment please……………………………………………………………..

OK, so my biggest beef here is the Alberta Solicitor General’s use of the phrase “exited delirium” in defence of taser use.  It was flatly determined after the death of Robert Dziekanski in Vancouver’s international airport that “exited delirium” is not a medical term.  It’s a vague and ambiguous term that does not describe any particular biological problem or pharmacological effect within the body.  It’s a term that’s meant to explain things away…and it’s a sure fire sign of some one who either has no clue what they’re talking about or some one that is trying to defend something that doesn’t warrant defence.

I don’t mind tasers being used as a last resort to take some one down…but the problem is that it’s not often used as a last resort.  In this case it sounds as though the use of the “conductive energy device” was no more justifiable than it usually is.  They used it before trying to physically subdue the guy.  If four cops had tried to wrestle the guy to the ground and just couldn’t do it and had sustained injuries in the process, then fine; ZAP the guy.  Doesn’t ever seem to work that way though does it?

“Exited delirium” is an escapist term and all it tells me is that public officials don’t actually know enough about conductive energy devices to be governing their use.

Nope, not an Obama fund raiser, just every Canadian man woman and child’s share of something I totally missed.  On the 14th of this month, it was revealed in the Calgary Herald that Harper’s conservative confirmed behind closed doors that they would be willing to spend up to $225 Billion to buy up debt in order to protect the integrity of Canada’s banks.  Oddly enough, this didn’t hit the news until the eve of the election…so I’m not sure how many people saw that.  I’m pretty disappointed that I missed it myself but that was a work week full of 12 and 14 hour days.  And…uhh…my 3rd cousin twice removed living in Bangalore died after being ambushed by a swarm of angry weevils.  I had other things on my mind.

When the USA put up $700 Billion for their famed bail out, I thought it was terrible.  I mean, that cost every person in the states $75 a day for a month.  This is even worse.  Assuming the conservatives come through and give up all of that $225 billion, that will cost every Canadian man woman and child almost $225 per day for a month.

At this point, it should become clear that taxes don’t actually pay for much of anything…we just devalue our currency when we need some extra cash.  Of course we never say we devalue our currency, we just say that we’re printing more of it.  This is the big problem I have with fiat currency.  It robs us of our cash and there’s pretty much nothing we can do about it.

True freedom is measured in your ability to make descisions for yourself.  Consider this.  You can’t save your money without the help of a bank.  Take an inflation rate of 2% per year, and see what happens to your savings if you stuff em in a mattress.  Save $100,000 in cash and tuck it away.  Want to know how much spending power you’re going to have in 50 years?  Heck, say you get an inheritance of such an amount and in 50 years, you go after it.  It’ll be worth about $36,416.

What is it that depreciated in value?  Did the work used to generate the income depreciate in value?  Impossible.  It’s been done and paid for.  It’s an issue of the past.  Did the person doing the work become less valuable?  Well, even if they did, the work was already done so this is actually irrelevant I suppose.  The only thing that became less valuable was the currency itself because of an annual inflation rate.  If you don’t want to keep your money in a bank, your productivity is robbed of you every year a little bit at a time.  I hate that.  Whats’ even worse is that we’re trapped in this continuous spiral of debt creation and value loss.  Bail outs like this simply accelerate the problem.

If the government decides to “print” $225 billion all of a sudden, it devalues the money I have.  I was paid that money because me and my employer decided that my time and labour was worth a particular amount.  This is frankly unfair.

For the people who have come here via stevemegan.blogspot.com, (An awesome blog) I do offer up my apologies. I’m sure that after reading my “Being David Hasselhoff” contest entry, you were expecting to find more funny…but you were greeted with grim not funny in my last post.  Yes, it was unfortunate and hopefully that ends here.

To all my other readers, (Candy for you..candy for you…and…hey, where’s the third guy?) don’t worry; we’re back into the lighter zone.  No more hanging black drapes in my room, lighting candles and reading from the necrinomicon.  Instead we’ll talk about dead mice.  Hmm…ok, this is funny.  I promise you.  Maybe a little gross, but still, I thought it was hilarious.

Seems a family found a dead mouse in the middle of a block of cheese they had purchased.  Aside from that being an awesome way to go for a mouse, there was apparently no health risk to the family.  The Canadian Food Inspection Agency cleared the company (Maple Dale) of being any possible threat to public health and said that the Mouse probably travelled in with some outside ingredients used to make the cheese.

So we got the facts of the case right?  Block of cheese (containing jalapeños…yummy) was shipped with a mouse encased inside.  Like a cheesy version of Hans Solo…just not carbonite this time.  CFIA says no health risk.  No one got sick.  No one died.  Just to be on the safe side, Maple Dale recalled 300 blocks of cheese on its own.  No public recall was done.  The guy who owns Maple Dale says that we live in a real world and this does happen.  They regret that it did but hey, let’s move on right?  Now despite this, what do I see in the CBC comments?

With all the crap going wrong with our food supply he should have said ‘We do live in a medieval world and it happened.’

With all the crap going wrong with our food supply?  Give me a freakin’ break.  You see this?  Huh?  You see this?  Well no you don’t because this is a text based blog and I’m not posting a picture but I’m doing that whole “little violin” playing your tune thing.  Yah…get over it complainy pants.  Sheeze.

With the news media we have today, we get inundated with information from all over the place.  Stup…err..some people seem to be unable to interpret it as receiving information from around the world and seem to relate to the news they hear as if it’s all going down just a block away from them.  I was listening to the radio one day and heard a news broadcast of a school shooting in progress and that the police were on their way…before the police had even gotten there, I was hearing (here in Saskatoon) about something that was just starting to happen in Kentucky?  Wow…talk about instant information delivery.  How long do you think it would have taken for me to hear about that 50 years ago…would I have even ended up hearing about it?

There is nothing wrong with our food supply.  A dead mouse being found by some family somewhere doesn’t make the food supply any worse either.  In fact, I would bet that the North American food supply is perhaps about the best quality food supply on the planet.  I can’t vouch for the food supply’s long term security, but the current quality rocks my boxers.  It should be rocking yours too…or if you wear briefs, it should be snapping them frequently.

When reading the news, one needs to consider a few things.  First off, the news media is infested by a bunch of rating hungry idiots that need to sell ad space and they know that when you’re scared out of your mind about something, you’ll be reading/watching/listening more often.  Second, when you’re getting the news, you’re getting information from all over the place.  You are probably processing local information at the same time as you are processing information that is more relevant to some guy in Germany than it is to you…wherever you are.  When you hear that 20 people were gunned down by some guy in Nigeria you need to consider that while that is indeed tragic, it’s not actually relevant to you in all likely hood.  The world is not going to hell in a hand basket because some one far away from you died or came down with some horrible illness.  The world is turning as it normally does…you’re just finding out about more of it than you’re accustomed to.

The last epidemic outbreak of something in Canada resulted in 20 deaths…among a population of about 32 million…over a few months.  When you’re freaking out about stuff you shouldn’t be freaking out about, can you please for the love of Pete just put things into perspective?

What would you do if you found out that one of your friends from some years ago was a child molester?  How would you feel?  Do you think these feelings would be any different if you were a parent or not?

Let me tell you a story that started a number of days ago.  I only realized it had started though when I woke up this morning to check messages on my blackberry.  The smile I had on my face quickly vanished as it was replaced with a feeling of sickness and shock.  I couldn’t tell my partner what I had just read because it came as such a violent jolt to my senses.  I made a snap decision to restore the smile and act as though everything was fine.  She would be out the door in minutes so I was ok…I of course felt guilty for masking my feelings but it’s ok.  This wouldn’t do anything positive for her through her day and I didn’t need to unload any emotional baggage onto her anyhow.

The message which had made my stomach turn said simply that a friend of mine was a child molester and that thank goodness, he had finally been arrested.  I responded to ask if they could tell me any more and to let them know of my shock…but I knew I was just going to google the info I wanted to find and so I did.  The return message was simply born of a want to distance myself from this feeling I had.  It was truly terrible.

It turns out that the message (Which included a snide “nice friends you have” remark which I don’t think was unwarranted I guess) contained a strong element of truth.  Devon Shane Brandon was arrested in Lloydminster which is only a three hour drive away from me.  This is the end of the story though, the beginnings have given me a sense of fear that I’m not sure I have ever felt before.

On October 15th, I received the following message from Devon on Facebook.

What’s happening pal…I liove just north of you now….I’m in the city quite often though

I was quite happy to hear from some one I considered an old friend from my past. Devon was the type who was constantly out of touch so I had always thought it would only be a matter of time before I ran into him again.

When I first met Devon, I was a homeless kid in Winnipeg Manitoba.  From the viewpoint of a naive kid from British Columbia, I saw him as a make work project for myself.  I was entirely into the “good deeds” ideal.  I remember for instance being homeless and hungry standing in the Eaton’s Centre entranceway looking at my last 60 some odd cents in change resting in my hand.  A homeless fellow who was probably in his 40′s zeroed in on me, looked right at my hand and asked, “Any spare change?”  Being such a naive kid, I gave it all to him.  This was how distorted my world view was.

Devon was on the wrong side of the law despite having an incredible intellect.  He could solve math equations faster than my calculator and always had a new idea on the go.  The problem was that he had never been taught a work ethic or the value of acting in an honourable manner.  Of course it wasn’t too long before I ended up in remand for fraud right along side the friend I had tried so hard to steer on the right path.  In the end of that chapter though, I had only allowed myself to be steered onto my own path of stupidity.  It was incredibly disappointing and so of course, after all that, me and Devon parted ways and I continued on my life in a way that I figured was proper.  Perhaps it was the past hope of Devon’s reform that encouraged me when I saw this message on my facebook wall.

what’s up pal….doing alright just trying to put life back together right now been clean over a year…no booze no drugs no crime feeling pretty good really…very much in love with a woman right now but we’ll see how it pans out….I’ll be in Saskatoon in the summer we gotta get together….dinners on me

The message seemed at the time like it was an indication of good times to be had in the future.  Now it feels like it’s a bullet that’s been dodged.  Being a father of two wonderful girls, I can’t describe the feelings that have welled up within me.  I don’t know whether I should label them as sadness, fear, violation or what…all I can say for sure is that it’s definitely not good.

Devon Shane Brandon was arrested yesterday evening in Lloydminster on charges of sexually assaulting a 9 year old Winnipeg girl and other children in Saskatchewan.  Not surprisingly, he also had other charges outstanding.

I don’t know what exactly I should be feeling right now…I know I’m not feeling good.  As other experiences in the past have shown me, it is always possible to have something come right out of left field to wipe the smile right off your face and brutally quash any happiness you may be feeling.  Things will get better and life will go on but this is one of those things I will be hard pressed to forget.  It will always make me wonder about the faith I have in human integrity.

If I was religious, I would pray. I don’t know how to gain the comfort I seek. All I know for now is that my day feels terribly wrong. My world has been shaken.